More about Asian and white women

Christina is outraged by my comments from my previous post about Asian women looking for different attributes in men than white women. She wrote:

WTF! Really, let me state that again. WTF! The only women that don't want men who are educated, introverted, and have stable careers are women that are a) uneducated, b) wildly unpredictable and c) poor.

While obviously my points a, b and c are generalizations, your comment about white women was the most ignorant I've seen in ages.

Well first of all, I agree that being educated is generally always a plus. But how much of a plus? For Asian women, it may be a plus three, but for white women only a plus one.

Being introverted isn’t considered a good quality in the United States. One presumes that like most psychological characteristics, introversion/extroversion is distributed along a bell curve. The ideal place to be in the United States would be perhaps a half to a whole standard deviation from the median on the extroverted side.

If you read a lot of personal ads at online dating sites, you’ll see that people say they are “outgoing” quite a bit, because it’s a desired characteristic.

The average Asian is more introverted than the average Caucasian. So Asian women are more used to being around introverted people because their families are more introverted, and they are more introverted themselves so they would be more comfortable with someone similarly introverted.

And finally we get to the issue of a “stable career.” I’m not sure exactly what that means, but it’s a phrase that I see used a lot and I mimicked it. Stable seems to mean safe but boring. IT is a safe career, but considered very boring. I suspect that a lot of white women see a job in IT as a minus.

I think that one or two generations ago, American women desired men who would be good providers and fathers, but today physical attractiveness and an exciting personality have become ascendant. Of course, physical attractiveness is what men always wanted in women, so I guess women have become more like men.

Comments

[Anti-Anonymous]

I'm not disagreeing with your point of view about masculine males and feminine females.

Then there is no need to raise the red herring of an impending reversal between the rule and the exception.

[Anti-Anonymous]

What is a "soc writer"?

[Anti-Anonymous]

I assume it has nothing to do with footware.

[Wendy]

*sigh* I meant you took my comment about assumptions too generally. I was responding to you, but it was a comment about stereotypes in general. The features that we're attracted to in the opposite sex, and what defines very masculine and very feminine is biological anyways, and not an assumption. The comment that blacks are more masculine and asian females are more feminine can be construed as an assumption, but that could be backed up by statistical data. To be told by the dominant male population what an Asian female most likely likes, wants and feels is definately an assumption, and not appreciated. It's uncalled for, especially since my life personally don't follow all those assumptions, and that might be saying that I don't fit the scope of what is 'Asian'. I'm proud of being Asian, but reserve the right to construe my own experience of being an Asian female by myself, and not through being assaulted by other people's stereotypes.

[Wendy]

soc=sociology

[Anti-Anonymous]

It's uncalled for, especially since my life personally don't follow all those assumptions, and that might be saying that I don't fit the scope of what is 'Asian'. I'm proud of being Asian, but reserve the right to construe my own experience of being an Asian female by myself, and not through being assaulted by other people's stereotypes.

This is what I mean by "obscurantist nominalism". Someone says, "women are more verbal than men" and points to SAT scores. Someone else says, "But I'm a woman and I'm less verbal than my boyfriend. I do not appreciate being assaulted with stereotypes." The exception does not disprove the rule. Saying that every person is ultimately unique is as true as, and and false as saying that every person is basically the same.

People in contemporary American culture often seem to want frank and open discussion about race, gender, and sexual orientation but regularly retreat into moralizing about the adverse effects of "stereotypes", which is at odds with engendering a genuinely frank and open discussion about necessarily collective topics such as race and gender.

The world is big and the human brain is small. No human will ever grok each of the 6 billion human inhabitants of this world in their uniqueness. Stereotypes are inevitable. As generalizations, they will be either more or less accurate. Moralizing adds little to the fact finding when it doesn't preempt the process entirely.

[Libertarian Man of Mystery]

I agree with everything Anti-Anonymous said! Maybe he should be writing this blog instead of me.

And he's a Heinlein fan too. Heinlein is a topic I've been meaning to write about since my sex change. Hot blonde girls don't read science fiction, so I couldn't mention Heinlein when I was Libertarian Girl.

[Anti-Anonymous]

Maybe he should be writing this blog instead of me.

You have more patience and a better sense of humor than I have.

[Karen]

Stereotypes are inevitable. As generalizations, they will be either more or less accurate.
...
The exception does not disprove the rule.

Then simply take it that any exceptions raised are there to support the generalization being less accurate, not more.

Any generalizations made are less controversial if there's a study (any study) of some sort to back it up. It's just that most people don't have a lexicon of academic papers to reference in casual debate.

[Anti-Anonymous]

Then simply take it that any exceptions raised are there to support the generalization being less accurate, not more.

Fair enough.

This approach is more constructive than the hystrionic moralizing favored by people as wise and caring and correct as Wendy.

Yet no exceptions to the generalizations have been offered to this point. That you and Wendy are evidently not in the habit of dating short, geeky, introverted (yet stedfast and reliable) Northeast Asian males is consistent with the predictions that arise from the generalizations.

Finding several examples of Black females who prefer relationships with Northeast Asian males would support the contra-positive. Finding an overall pattern of would disprove the generalizations.

Yahoo Personals yeilds few counter examples.